今日のジョーク。

今日、四時間目は生物学だった。

アレルギーのことを学んだ。
この世界で、色々なアレルギーがあるよ。
花粉やナッツやじゃがいもなど...

これが今日のジョークです：

大蒜にアレルギーがある人もいますが、誰でしょうか？

吸血鬼！！！！

♪~yik~♪

Romeo x Juliet

Yesterday saw a funny scene on a show named "Kids Nation".
There were two boys performing "Romeo and Juliet".They were suppose to perform some kind of jokes...
The performance goes like this :

Juliet : "Oh Romeo,Romeo,where are you~~"
Romeo : "WAIT!!! I am PEEing!!!"

~~~~*~~~~*~~~~*~~~~*~~~~*~~~~*~~~~
Romeo : "Hey,Juliet! Let down your hair!So that I can climb up your stupid hair!"
Juliet : "I am not Rapunzal!!!" *still let down her (his,were 2 boys acting,remember?) hair*
Romeo : "Hey! Your hair is too short! I cannot reach it!!" *Jumps and try to get the hair*

~~~~*~~~~*~~~~*~~~~*~~~~*~~~~*~~~~
Lolx...That was really,quite funny...

♪~yik~♪

-Little jokeS-

A normal day passed by~I have nothing to write.So,I decided to put something from what I received in my e-mail.

These are short Questions&Answers between Doctor&Patient :

HEALTH :QUESTION & ANSWER SESSION

Q: I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life; is this true?
A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's it... don't waste them on exercise. Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; that's like saying you can extend the life of your car by driving it faster. Want to live longer? Take a nap.

Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables?
A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does a cow eat? Hay and corn. And what are these? Vegetables. So a steak is nothing more than an efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to your system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef is also a good source of field grass (green leafy vegetable). And a MIXED GRILL can give you 100% of your recommended daily allowance of vegetable products.

Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake?
A: No, not at all. Wine is made from fruit. Brandy is distilled wine, that means they take the water out of the fruity bit so you get even more of the goodness that way. Beer is also made out of grain. Bottoms up!

Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?
A: Well, if you have a body and you have fat, your ratio is one to one. If you have two bodies, your ratio is two to one, etc.

Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program?
A: Can't think of a single one, sorry. My philosophy is: No Pain...Good!

Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you?
A: YOU'RE NOT LISTENING!!! ... Foods are fried these days in vegetable oil. In fact, they're permeated in it. How could getting more vegetables be bad for you?

Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle?
A : Definitely not! When you exercise a muscle, it gets bigger. You should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger stomach.

Q: Is chocolate bad for me?
A: Are you crazy? HELLO. Cocoa beans! Another vegetable!!! It's the best feel-good food around!

Q: Is swimming good for your figure?
A: If swimming is good for your figure, explain WHALES to me.

Q: Is getting in-shape important for my lifestyle?
A: Hey! 'Round' is a shape!

~END~

Haha....That's all...I still laugh everytime I read it.
Hope you have fun today.
Enjoy.

♪~yik~♪

@~Funny Translation~@

These are what I found from the Internet....
They are funny.Probably they did that translations on purpose...
I hope you enjoy them!!!!
HAHA!!!
I don't think you'll still have appetite after reading the food's name in English. Lost my appetite on that...
So,one must carefully,fall into the river.
Do you want to CHANGE friends?

Self-terminating machine.I don't think you'd like to near it.....

Ah well...That's all!

♪~yik~♪

Answers WE wish to try out in EXAM

These are continued from last time's exam paper answers which I wish to write in my SPM...(though I don't have the guts to write it....I don't dare to FAIL all my subjects...

This one suits Bio students.Why?Read it then you'll know it. =)

Enjoy!

♪~yik~♪

*~冷笑话区(2)~*

冷笑话

摘自石国良的"冷笑话书籍"(?) :

有一天,小明与同学打完羽球后,回到了家中....
他冲了个凉后就回到了自己的房间..................
....................................................
然后!!!!!!!!!!!
.............*.....*.....*................
........*......................*...........
....*...............................*......
...............*.......*...................
..........*..................*.............
...................*.......................

他就睡着了.

~冷~
还有下章噢!

♪~yik~♪

*~冷笑话区(1)~*

冷笑话

摘自完美世界:

在一个被遗弃了的村子,有一间破烂不堪的小木屋........
小木屋的旁边有一口井.........
过了十年................
...................................................................
一百年..................
...................................................................
一千年..............
*.....**...........**.............**.............**...........**.....*
*.....**............................**............................**.....*
*.....**...........**.............**.............**...........**.....*
*.....**....**....................**....................**....**.....*
*.....**............................**............................**.....*
**.........**.............**.............**..............**.........**
*....................**.............**.............**....................*
**...........................**.........**..............................**
它还是一口井.



*冷*......
下一次还有更冷的噢!
敬请期待!!

♪~yik~♪

*YAWNS*

Yesterday and day before I did not online....I was so tired that I slept early those 2 days....Usually I'll sleep at about 12am....But last night and last last night,I slept at about 9.30pm....LOLXXX

Share something with you....I so wish that I can answer my exam papers as below's....

Too bad,I don't have the guts to write them in my exam papers....There's more...I'll upload them next time..

Have fun!

♪~yik~♪

Soooo COLD!!??

Because HAZE is invading Malaysia again,the weather is so hot that everybody can only think of getting a nice sleep in an air-conditioned room soundly......Just by talking about it make me so sleepy...*yawn*

We were so boring that during our last period,me and 3 of my friends joked with "COLD jokes" to make ourselves COOLER....(do you think we can?Hell no...)

1st joke [for people who knows (chinese) only] :

There's a brother(Yi Tiao) and a sister(Xiao Li) whose parents have died long time ago and they were staying with their aunty(GuGu).

One day, GuGu bring them to the sea for a swim.GuGu told them not to swim too far beforeletting them go for their swim.

But,it is really rare for this brother and sister to go for swim,so the brother,Yi Tiao is really excited and forgot about his GuGu's order and he swam further and further away.

GuGu realised that Yi Tiao had swam too far away so she ordered Xiao Li to call her brother back to the shore......So,Xiao Li stand by the sea and shouted towards her brother :

"YI TIAO!!!!GUGU JIAO" (Yi Tiao,GuGu [calls you]-[jiao])

People who don't know chinese please refer to your friends who know chinese!!

2nd joke will be post up by tomorrow.Because I'm lacking off funny things!!HAHAHA!!!
Wait for it then!
Enjoy!

♪~yik~♪

"Saik's Law"

The words are pretty small...soo.....try to concentrate then!!!HAHAHAHA!!!!

Enjoy!!

♪~yik~♪

Funny Chinese thing...

This happened during our chinese period...My funny classmates play with the 名句精华...

We read a 名句精华....Original --> 风声雨声读书声声声入耳..........
My class mates changed them into several types,ofcourse,I joined them in that too and I made these :

1.东升勇深和得生步步高升.........or

2.政骏嘉骏和彦骏都不英俊........or

3.雯绫宝铃和铱玲事事显灵........

Only for fun...Don't take it seriously...>.♥
Those who can't read chinese...sorry for that~because I don't know how am I suppose to translate it...Gomen ne~~

♪~yik~♪

I've finally used my TINY knowledge about chemistry

It was yesterday..I didn't get to write it down~

Yesterday,I was with my friend eating in canteen during recess time.
She bought a bowl of nooodles and added a big spoon of sambal.After she ate some,she complained that its not hot/spicy enough.
With that,I concluded that the chemistry's theory is quite right.

The experiment shown by my friend to me--->

Constant variable : 2 chemicles are represented by.......Noodles + Soup......
Manipulated variable : (catalyst) sambal/chilli sauce/anything that's hot....
responding variable : My friend's eating rate (rate of reaction)

Conclusion after so-called-experiment:
@My friend's eating rate increases with the increase in catalyst=.=
@Her eating rate decreases with the decrease in catalyst=.=

How's it?Feeling "Now only I know that chemistry theory is RIGHT!!!"

♪~yik~♪

Chinese Names....

Chinese Names

Caller : Hello, can I speak to Annie Wan? ( anyone)

Operator : Yes, you can speak to me.

Caller: No, I want to speak to Annie Wan!
Operator: You are talking to someone! Who is this?

Caller: I'm Sam Wan (someone) And I need to talk to Annie Wan! It's urgent.
Operator: I know you are someone and you want to talk to anyone! But what'sthis urgent matter about?

Caller: Well... just tell my sister Annie Wan that our brother Noel Wan ( no one ) wasinvolved in an accident. Noel Wan got injured and now Noel Wan is being
sent to the hospital. Right now, Avery Wan is on his way to the hospital.
Operator: Look if no one was injured and no one was sent to the hospital, then the accident isn't an urgent matter! You may find this hilarious but I don't
have time for this!

Caller: You are so rude! Who are you?
Operator: I'm Saw Lee. (sorry)
Caller: Yes! You should be sorry. Now give me your name!!

Another from my friend.Enjoy.

♪~yik~♪

Students Attention

To: All Students!

In order to assure the highest levels of quality work and productivity from students, it will be our policy to keep all students well taught through our program of SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TEACHING ( S.H.I.T.).

We are trying to give our students more S.H.I.T. than anyone else. If you feel that you do not receive your share of S.H.I.T. on the course, please see your lecturer. You will be immediately placed at the top of the S.H.I.T. list, and our lecturers are especially skilled at seeing that you get all the S.H.I.T. you can handle.

Students who don't take their S.H.I.T ........... will be placed in DEPARTMENTAL EDUCATIONAL EVALUATION PROGRAMS ( D.E.E.P. S.H.I.T.).

Those who fail to take D.E.E.P. S.H.I.T. seriously will have to go to EDUCATIONAL ATTITUDE TRAINING (E.A.T. S.H.I.T.). Since our lecturers took S.H.I.T. before they graduated, they don't have to do S.H.I.T. anymore, and are all full of S.H.I.T. already.

If you are full of S.H.I.T., you may be interested in a job teaching others. We can add your name to our BASIC UNDERSTANDING LECTURE LIST ( B.U.L.L. S.H.I.T.).

For students who are intending to pursue a career in management and consulting, we will refer you to the department of MANAGERIAL OPERATIONAL RESEARCH EDUCATION ( M.O.R.E. S.H.I.T.). This course emphasizes how to manage M.O.R.E. S.H.I.T.

If you have further questions, please direct them to our HEAD OF TEACHING, SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING(H.O.T. S.H.I.T .).

Thank you, BOSS IN GENERAL, SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TEACHING (B.I.G. S.H.I.T.)

Thank You for your time.

Sincerely,

The Director Under the Michigan Bureau of Super High Intensity Teaching

(The D.U.M.B. S.H.I.T .)

Got this from my friend.Have fun reading this!♥

♪~yik~♪