ツ・ラ・イ

辛いです。




本当です。


もう生きたくなくなちゃったんだ。


でもダメですね。


こんなに悲観的なことを言うのがダメですね。






だけど、誰か．．．
私のことを．．．気にしているのかよ？
いないでしょ？





一人のが好きだけど、
やはり、
私の考え知らないままで側にいる友達がいるでも、



淋しい。
悲しい。

孤独が怖がってるなんてなんかない。
淋しいとか悲しいの感じが怖がってるなんてなんかない。




ただ、
誰でも、
皆は、
みんなは、

私の、本当の気持ちが分からないから。




でもさ、すべて私のせいだ。

自分がいつも自分本当の気持ちをみんなの前で隠している。
誰でも見せない。

♪~yik~♪

I'm in school now!今学校でいます！

今、学校でいます。
図書館のコンピューターを使っている、生物学の研究のために、インタネットでリサーチは必要～！

とにかく、後もう一回ブログポースト書くかもしれん～！

ここで。

♪~yik~♪

What the Heck?

Today.

I was suppose to have ESL for period 0 in the morning.
But then, the teacher told us that it will be canceled because she has something else to do.
So, that means I have 3 periods left.

Period 1 to period 3 I have no classes, which means I can then go to school at 11.30am.
Since I only have class starting on period 4 which is at 11.50am.

What makes me feel that today is stupid is that.
Not long after lunch, entering period 5, there's a teacher who came up to us and told us that our Biology class' teacher is not here and there's no teacher to cover us, so, we can just go home.
And I have period 5 and 6 for Biology.

Total classes I went today:

1.

What the heck. =w=
I was nearly late though....Too tired and I woke up at about 10am this morning after my dad phoned me telling me that he arrived at Brisbane....Lolx

クソォォ～～！たった今晩ご飯を食べたのに．．．まだ腹へったの感じで．．．なんだよ私は！！！

♪~yik~♪
追伸：多分母ちゃんからの遺伝子！ムードが食欲を影響タイプだった。

HURTS!!!

My muscle....no....I don't have muscle.....
My legs and arms hurt.
筋肉痛．．．いや、違う。筋肉がない．．．XD
両手と脚が痛いです～！

And this is because, my feet are already hurting since last month, which I once doubt that maybe I broke a smallllllll bone in my foot because it got swollen once for a couple of days.
But somehow, it suddenly stopped hurting and no swollen anymore, so I didn't do anything about it.
実はですね、先月から足がもう痛いそうでしたんだけど．．．でもしばらく痛くなくなったから、あまり自分の脚のことを注意しなくなった様でしたあたしは～

Continue from the above, my feet are already hurting and
last Saturday, I did part-time work from 9.30am to 6pm (which requires walking to serve coffee as well) then,
Sunday night, which is last night, I played badminton with my dad and uncle and cousin brother.
And just now, we went for cycling for about....one hour....
そして、
先週の土曜日に、朝9時半から午後6時までのバイトで歩くが必要なんだ（お客さんのコーヒーをサーブ）。
次、昨夜、1時間バドミントン、父ちゃんと伯父と従弟と一緒にやりました。
あと、今日、さっき1時間のサイクリングをしました！
痛い!足と手が！

My god.
My legs and arms hurt.
まじで、痛い。

何というか．．．運動できたんで嬉しいけど．．．
明日また歩いて学校へならない．．．大変そう！

♪~yik~♪

BAD minton!!!

Yay~~~I finally did some sports after I came to Australia for .....nearly 10months!!!
I've already gained about 10kg after I got here......XD

I know I'll be laughed at when I return to M'sia....Anywayz....
I'm already used to that.

Tomorrow I still have to walk to school in the morning.......HAIZ.

♪~yik~♪

どうでもできなくなってった．．．

父ちゃん来たから、私は別にインタネットを無駄にするのはダメになちゃうんだ。

そういう意味は、昨日の『Mステ』と今晩の『スクラップ・ティチャー』も見えなくなりましたことでした。





あああああああ
嫌だ！！！
見たいゎ！！！
裕翔たち！



あとね、もう中国語の口述試験が終わったって～ストレスレベル減った～～～
だけどまだストレスある。
だって、こっちの親戚たちはいつも私に彼たちの娘さん〔私の従妹〕を比べている。（確かに彼女が頭いい方だ。こっち頭よくねーや。）
でもまだ終わってない宿題山ほどある．．．

♪~yik~♪

Chinese Oral Exam

Hmm....I thought this would be quite a nice notice for students...Sorry if you cannot read it...
I was too lazy to adjust my phone to where I can take a better picture of it...

It's saying:

Tables
are
NOT
FOR SITTING.

I took this before I went into the oral exam room....lolx

And I took this photo~~two men mowing grass~~~(My dad and my uncle...lolx...BROTHERLY LOVE = MOW GRASS TOGETHER!<<The one in yellowish-orange shirt is my dad,in blue is my uncle.I don't know why but this picture looked like my dad is having fun with the machine like a kid....my weird logic...

♪~yik~♪

いい子になれ！

とうちゃんが来たから、いい子にならなきゃ．．．

だから、明日の『スクラップ・ティチャー』を見るのはダメ．．．
今晩のMステで出ます彼たちのことも見なかった．．．
寂しい～～！

あと、まだ終わってない宿題たくさんある。
明日バイトがあり、日曜日に中国語レッソン．．．そして！バドミントン！！！とうちゃんと一緒にやります！
久しぶりだ～～！
マレーシアに戻ったら、絶対たくさんバドミントンするゎ！
最近．．．いや、違う。
今のあたしは全然運動不足！

まじで太い！

♪~yik~♪

*ATTENTION* my dad is here~

As the title said.
My dad is here for 4days.

And I'm so dead tomorrow.
I have Chinese oral exam tomorrow and I haven't practice at all! HAHA.

DEAD.

♪~yik~♪

ｵﾒﾃﾞ(`・(●●)´・+)b㌧㌧☆｡+ﾟ*｡+ﾟ

Hey! Say! JUMP
～～～新しいシングルリリース～～～



―☆☆☆―　　　―★★―　　　―☆☆☆―

『真夜中のシャドーボーイ』

―☆☆☆―　　　―★★―　　　―☆☆☆―

彼たちのニューシングルを買いたいけど、
それぐらいなら払うことできるけど、
「インタネットから買うことはダメ」っと親たち．．．

残念！

とにかく、おめでとうね！
もう一回シングルランキングで1位取ってね～！

♪~yik~♪

Dissection.

WARNING!
PG-rated!!!!
UNDER 16 ARE NOT ALLOWED TO VIEW!!!

We, dissected, RAT.
As you can see below~~~~XD

.Liver.
The pointer is pointing on the liver.
The liver is sooooooooooo soft and its like...so many layers...
The bean like thing in pink on the right of the liver is the stomach.!!Testis!!

Lolx...We squeezed the scrotum from outside and the testis came out from inside...
And you can see, the pointer is pointing on the testis and there's something that looks like a cap attached on it is the vas deferens.
So, guys, I think the 'squeezing' has same effect on human.....*smirks*.SHIT.
The pointer is pointing on the colon(the green colour ones are large intestine).
And you can see from the picture, those small oval-like-shapes that are in the colon are our well known SHIT.
Hey, for someone out there who will be reading my blog, Yeah! you know I mean you.
I purposely took this picture for you!.Foetus.
Can you see the small ball-like-blood sacs?
That's the amniotic fluid surrounding the foetus developing in the placenta~~
I think they are about....7weeks?
Because, actually, if we look closer, the eyes of the foetus have already developed.
Too bad~~I couldn't take a closer pic....It'd be out of focus and you will end up seeing pitch black.

.Mother of the Foetus.
Can you see the chain of sacs? Near the left hind leg of the rat-mother?
Aren't they cute?
Too bad.
Us human beings are so cruel that we feed them to kill them for experiments.

―☆☆―　　　　　　　　―★★★―　　　　　　　　―☆☆―

Haha.
That's all for now~!
I still have so much homework undone~~~
I'm lazy to do them though~~~

最近超ストレス。

♪~yik~♪

ZZzzZZzzZZ

My dad will be coming to Melbourne again on Thurday~~~~
What will happen next?

The next day (Friday) I have chinese oral exam.....What the heck....Hate it.

Anywayz, I somehow hope that I can play badminton (I need to exercise a bit....getting fat!) with my dad when he come....
But I wonder that is his foot alright or not...Cuz last time when he was here, he kind of sprain his foot. Furthermore, we don't have badminton racket....zzzz

♪~yik~♪

Mステ見た？KKM見た？

さっき、Mステ見たよ。
Hey!Say!JUMPが出ますから見る。

カッコイイゎ~
来週も出るかもしれませんね？

ってーか．．．今回の服は特別だと思うよ～！
ただ四人だけが赤いジャケットを着けている、ほかのメンバーは黒いジャケット。
そしてその四人は、すなわち裕翔、涼介、知念と大貴です。
新しいドラマで出てる四人だ～！『スクラップ・ティチャー』と言うやつ。
ね？

裕翔の声は昔と異なるだよね？
だんだん大人っぽくって。魅力的ぞ！
知念の声もそうなっているね？！でもまだかわいい～～～！チッチェのに～！
涼介の声は．．．なんか変わらないと思いません？？大貴も。

(。δ_δ。)ノハイ、次。
『今日からマ王！』。
第3シリーズ最新のエピソードもYouTubeで見ました！

勝利が、おかしい。
エルを会ったとき、何とかおかしい顔をしたって、怖いと思う．．．
勝利も、かわいいものが好きだと思う！
えーと．．．第2シリーズのとき、ウォルフラムのこと、嫌いじゃないですね？
ウォルフラムは可愛くて、有利の婚約者だって、納得みたいですね？
だけど、勝利はムラケンとかコンラートとか．．．ちょっとあんまり好きじゃないみたいですね？

今回ウォルフのシーンがほとんどない．．．コンラートも。
ウォルフと有利のシーンを見たいね！！

♪~yik~♪

Slacking.

I have been slacking for three days.....Did not touch my homework at all.......DEAD.

Anyway, now I have to do triple what I should be doing last few days........
*sigh..*


Oh!....It has been a long time since I last sigh....
My mum used to tell me that we should not sigh, because sighing only makes you feel more stressed and pressure.....Make you feel mentally uncomfortable, miserable.
Instead we should take a deep breathe and we will feel refreshed again.

By the way, I borrowed a book from the school library, "The Disgusting Dictionary".
Just as its title said. It tells you most of the disgusting words related to our daily lives.

For example, the word Fart:
1. Air Muffin/Air Biscuits (n)===> Fart.
2. Bake an air muffin/air biscuit (v)===> To fart.
3. Anal announcement (n)===>Fart.
4. Auditorium fart (n)===> A loud fart.

I reckoned that the book is not disgusting enough though.
Oh well...gotta start doing work!

♪~yik~♪

WOW! HEADACHE!

Lolx....I was stuck on my chemistry questions just now, for nearly 2hours.

And I seek for help from my friendS :

1. Soon Ee
2. Mei Chen
3. Viracle
4. Min Sern
5. Chow Khai

Hmm...as far as I remember, the above are those who did at least tried to help me solve the questions.
And the one who actually solved the 'mystery' is Soon Ee!!! *applause*
I cannot believe that Soon Ee couldn't get marks that's required for taking scholarship....He is so hardworking and so intelligent....=/

I asked my cousin sister too! But too bad, she forgot this part!


Anywayz, tomorrow I have chemistry test on Gas Law....Wish me luck!...Haven't study....
And I still haven't write up my chemistry pract for last week's experiment.....
So many things undone....haha

I suddenly feel like blogging, that's why I'm here.

とにかく、Ichigosdream.comと言うサイトから『今日からマ王！』の一つサウンドトラックのピアノ楽譜を取りまして、さっきプリントしました。そして、ピアノで弾いてみてしました。
スッゲェェ！！！！
よくできましたよ！
あぁ、それは「悲壮」と言うサウンドトラックの楽譜です。

『今日からマ王！』で出た他の音楽の楽譜も欲しい！

♪~yik~♪

Tired.....

Hmm....Let's see.....

Saturday :
- Wake up 7.30am.
- Prepare everything up and go to bus stop and wait for the bus 8.30am.
- Start doing part-time at 9.30am. (Bus comes at 8.45am and reach where I need to go at 9.15am)
- Forget about rest.
- Straight worked for 8 1/2 hours......
- Home at 6.30pm.
- Seriously tired and have to practise for Sunday's chinese oral SAC....
- BED at 12.30am, around that time...

Sunday :
- Wake up at 6.50am.
- Prepare everything up and walk to Box Hill Center to catch the train. (No bus in the morning for Sunday.......ツッコミ入ってもいい？トレインをキャッチって．．．ネットを使う！)
- The train was late for half an hour......Was suppose to get 8.09am train, instead it came at 8.32am.
- Get on to train, and get down on the third station. Then take bus. Was suppose to take the bus that comes at 8.22am, since the train was late, had to take the next bus which comes at 9.22am.
And, my chinese class starts at 9.30am, so definitely, I will be late.
- ........

Then, I studied for biology test from after dinner till midnight.......and I am soooooo sleepy right now.....

『スクラップ・ティチャー』

土曜日の夜、『スクラップ・ティチャー』を見ました。

まじでカッコイイ！

ってかさ．．．
なんでただ山ちゃん、知ぃと大ちゃんがカッコイイにしているの？
なんで裕翔はクラスメートにいじめられるの？

ムカツク．．．

第１集どこでダウンロードできる？

♪~yik~♪

何で！？何で！？何で！？

さっき、『真夜中のシャドーボーイ』のPV見たよ。

って．．．
なぜ！？！？！？何故！？！？！？ナゼ！？！？！？

もう見たみんなも気づいてたじゃないの？
最後、ただ山ちゃんだけ殺人微笑をしたんじゃない？
不公平！何で山ちゃんだけなの！？
ほかのメンバーの殺人微笑も見たいよ．．．（とくに裕翔の！私裕翔好きだから～）

でもさ、今回のは、まじカッコイイ！

そして、ユーとの声！
第一回の“Shadow”（背景の声だけ）をする人は山ちゃんだよね？気づくなかったよ私が。
第二回の“Shadow”をする人は裕翔だ！まだ知らなかった頃はもうそれを気にしていってて、「誰がやっていたの」と考えてた。今、知ってた！！！裕翔だ！！
カッコイイ！　＞ｗ＜

明日の「スクラップ・ティチャー」を見たいゎ～♪

♪~yik~♪

メルボルン動物園行った！I went to Melbourne Zoo~!

今日ね、生物学の遠足で、メルボルン動物園行きました！結構楽しかった。
I went for Biology excursion today to Melbourne Zoo~~~It was quite funnnnn~~!!
写真も撮ったぞ。
I was busy filling up my booklet for Biology SAC, so I could only take some pictures.....


Okay, let's see.....First of all, Mel, I promised you to bring elephant back...I TRIED!!! too bad it was too heavy that the rope that I tied the roller skate with the elephant on it to the train broke half way!.....LOLx.....craps.
Anywayz, I got you some elephants~~~(I wonder why you only said that you want elephant...)

Aren't them cute?~~With the one below showing you its bum!

We found this peacock wandering around the park with Merry-Go-Round...
Too bad it didn't open its hmm...tail?....I don't have mirror!And this is the koala~~~Sorry for the blurrrrr resolution....my mobile phone camera is only 1.2pix...

Okay~~Here goes for Emi!!! I don't understand why you like giraffe so much =/
But well, though my mobile phone resolution is seriously bad, it worked quite alright for your sake!

Anyways, I saw things that upset me as well.
Look at these photos down there.....
This first one is showing the 'food' on the plate for our Mr.Tarantula.Obviously, it's a mouse's baby.
Though it is dead.....It still makes me feel sad.It was a nice meeting with a stranger-Madam who told me that the Zoo feed some of the carnivorous animals here with other animal's baby, but usually only when they are dead.
But, the one below here, when I was taking this photo, it was still moving!!!!!....

Okay!
Let's have a look on some funny things.
First of all, presenting you this sign.
これはね、ちょっとKAT-TUNの番組を思い出させた。「KAT-TUNの先輩・教えてください!大人のオキテ100ア~ンド　くりぃむ」と言う番組だ。
中丸くんと田中くんが出たのそのエピソードだ。
It kind of remind me about KAT-TUN's show....It was a show called something like "KAT-TUN's 100 Rules to Become an Adult"....The part on where Nakamaru-kun and Tanaka-kun met up with the owner of a famous toy making factory in Japan.By the way, I don't really understand that why do they have to draw a zebra's back facing us to tell us that this is a smoking area....


Oh and, Steffi!!!!
We found your 3 siblings!!!!

Lastly,
Starring "Emi"! Our guest of the day! (lolx?)
With her love, Mr.GiraffeTouching a tiger!!!How brave!!! =w=....
By the way, our guest of the day made some new names and linked some new...erm......things and people together =) But, unluckily, I can only remember one.
Which is as below:

Chin - Chou

Chin, I bet you know who you are.
And actually, "Chou 蝶" means butterfly.
Emi came up with "Chin-Chou" after we paid visit to the butterfly breeding house.
Well....I can only say ------------------ IT MATCHES!



Okay. Done.
That's all.
Lolx....

Anyways, we worried our teachers =/
Because we didn't show up by 2.3opm which we were suppose to meet latest....
Okay, my bad, I forgot about the time....I was too concentrating on finishing the SAC....
Lolx.

♪~yik~♪
P/S:絶対、今週の「スクラップ・ティーチャ」を見ます！

なんって言うならな．．．

頭の中に何が心を騒ぎ中．．．




何それ感じ．．．？
自分も本当に分からないんだ．．．ムカツクやぁぁ．．．




誰が、命を貸してくれ？（今の感じは、人を殺したいわけですね？）






だって．．．どうすればいいんだよ？
もうだんだん我慢できなくなっている．．．

ひとりで、ひとりで、ひとりで、ひとりにするなんてのせいで．．．
月食のように、少しずつ自分の存在を隠すつもりになった．．．
もう自分の存在がいらないなんて感じている．．．
ワタシの命を消してくれ？


人の息を切らしている
人の考えを邪魔している
人の命を壊している
人の力を奪っている
それはなんですか？当たってもいいよ．．．だけど、答えは人によって違うのだよ。

♪~yik~♪

BEE EAN～お誕生日おめでとう～！

Happy Birthday to my "2nd-big-SISTER" in Malaysia~~~

HELEN LEE BEE EAN

!!!~~~HAPPY BIRTHDAY~~~!!!
！～お・誕・生・日・お・め・で・と・う～！
～＠＠＠生日快乐＠＠＠～

Lastly, SELAMAT HARI JADI!!!

Okay, that's all. Hope you have fun!
Oh and, actually which phone number are you using again?

18歳なりました！
ｵﾒｵﾒ━━━(ﾉ>ω<)ﾉ :｡･:*:･ﾟ'★,｡･:*:♪･ﾟ'☆━━━!!
♪~yik~♪

学校が始まった！

春休み終わった！
学校が始まった！
つまんないですね！
ハハハハ！

私何言ってんの！？
ごめんごめん、なんか、気の狂ったみたいな感じ．．．

そうだよ！圧力のせいだ！
ハハ～頭はもう、考えることできなくなりました！

あのね～今週の土曜日に、メルボルン動物園の遠足がありますよ．．．
動物園に行きたいけど、一日中ほかのレッスンに欠席するのが気にするんよ．．．
特に、日本語レッスンと化学科と数学．．．

♪~yik~♪

To my OLD Friends from St. James雅导. (which I am still able chat with you today)

Hmm....How should I start off?
Okay, like this:

To Fang Yi:
你还有来浏览我的部落格吗？
我有去看你的噢。不过你很少更新。。。

To Chicky:
打华文字感觉很奇怪。。。不过为了方便你，你看~我对你多好~！
我到现在还记得，我们两个真的是不打不相识的朋友~！
好怀念当年！
你真的，没有再练柳琴了吗？=X

你还记得吗？
哪天我们再见面吧~一起回雅导？XD

还有~记得Scan给我啊~怀念的儿童时代的作画~！
顺便连我画在写给你的信里的也一起Scan给我吧？拜托你咯~！

P/S：噢，对了。当年因为你跟我们不同班，所以好像并没有参与我们的“搜鬼俱乐部”（我自己讲的）噢？
有吗？没有吧？
我刚刚说想要问的事情就在下面。

To Char:
Char~~~I don't remember giving you my blog address, but oh well.

Anyways, there's always one thing that I wanted to ask you and Sarah so much but I just can't get it out of my throat when I am facing you guys.

Do you still remember those things that we talk about "Ghosts"?
I am wondering, why were you actually shocked when we saw "that" last time? (when we were in 5D, remember? The one that went into our class through the back door)
Because, since you said you were able to see ghost since you're a kid, but how come you were still shocked?

It's not that I suspect you on anything.

I still believe you, and I want to keep on believing in whatever you say.
Because.......I believe you? Haha.
Because I actually did see ghost, together with you and Sarah, so I really believe that ghosts spirits they are around us, that they really exist.

So.....Can you tell me why were you shocked to see "that" particular one?


Do you still remember the another incident?

The one that I made the paper-bell-shaped-thing-that-can-make-'tick-tock'-sound?
I really believe that you can see ghost because, you did tell us that that stupid bell was thrown away by "the thing" that was in our classroom, suppose to be reading our class billboard as what you told us.
And heck, yeah, we found my stupid bell UNDERNEATH all those rubbish in the rubbish bin.

Hmm.....But why were you shocked about "that" one?????

To Sarah:
Hey girl!
I suddenly wanted to say....

I missed you brushing your hair...=w=...Err.....lolx
I still remember how you like to brush your hair which was tied into two ...err...tails? over your shoulder. Looks really smooth =/ SUNSILK! (making CM for Sunsilk...lolz)

Hey, how many boyfriends you had d? Since you're just soooooooo cute.(XD)

To Marg:
Exam soon?
Since you put on your MSN that you're going to study tonight ( I don't know which "tonight" you mean though).....

Anywayz, God Bless You~!
LUCK ON YOU~

((○｡ωﾟ●)σﾟ･*:.｡. ☆ｧﾋｬﾋｬ☆.｡.:*･゜o(●ﾟω｡○))

That's all!? Oh my god!?
I only managed to contact with 5 people!?

Oh, by the way....Anyone still remember 陈健辉?
His dad made us our clothings for the performance of Chinese Orchestra, remember?
I kind of miss him =/ He's a nice kid. Wonder how he is~~

And, how about hmm....who else? There are so many of them from Chinese Orchestra....

♪~yik~♪

i hate studying more and more

XD
As the title said.
I never hate study before like now~~~
I used to don't really like to study, but I never HATE it.

Anywayz....I don't know what to say...

The only thing that I want to say right after I opened my mouth is

KILL ME.

Hmm...The only thing that come into my mind is that.
So yeah...

Mum, dad, don't scold me if I fail my chinese here.

♪~yik~♪

やはりダメなの？

私はね、．．．
やはり中国語にとってダメなの？

．．．
本当に．．．人と喋るのが下手だから．．．自分のこともほとんど人に教えないので．．．
よくそのような問題を答えることできなくなった．．．

って．．．
もし．．．
もしだけだよ。
もし、中国語の試験で赤い点を取ったら、
父ちゃん、母ちゃん、
私に怒られないで？

その口述試験って．．．
本当に頑張っているけど．．．
本当に本当に頑張っているですよ．．．

でもさ、やはり．．．おかしい感じで．．．
できなくなっている。

．．．
泣きたい。

♪~yik~♪